Productive Silence

I have only a few more days before school is out. While I love my studies, the break will be exceptionally nice. Its been awhile since I've had one. One thing I've learned this quarter, though, is the value of solitude and silence. Even if I only have a few minutes, taking the time to notice my flowers blooming or the hummingbird outside my window and marvel is rest for the soul. Or perhaps a silent prayer or a chapter from a Henri Nouwen book. Or a time of praying through the trinity icon sitting on my desk. Each of these things allows me to feel the presence of God in the midst of a busy day. I think, perhaps, we value accomplishment too much in our culture and only feel productive if we are "doing something." I think these quiet moments are equally valuable.

I think they are just as much preparation for my future as my frantic writing and endless studying. Or the tests and the grad school research and the language study. It gives me the opportunity to listen-- to find God and to find myself.

At this point in my life, I have many decisions to make. I will finish my undergrad studies in a year, during which time I will be pursuing studies in theology and social justice. I need to apply to grad school, where I plan to study theology. And then there is the question of where I will go from there. Full time ministry? Professorship? Sometimes the enormity of my decisions weighs on me. It is now, more than ever, that I feel the need to listen to the silence. In England, I will be taking a retreat to Lindisfarne, the Holy Island in Northern England where St. Aidan established an early Christian monastary. There, I hope to enjoy the solitude of a pilgrimage, seeking God's leading for my life. Perhaps the holy island is a thin place, where heaven meets earth. Or perhaps all places are just that.